For much of my life I spent an exorbitant amount of time trying to manage a perfect home, family and image. After many stumblings, failures and the exhaustion that accompanies the effort in trying to manage and manipulate every detail of life, I finally threw in the towel. Let’s face it, we cannot do it. It. is. not. possible. We are human. We all have stuff inside us that leads us to make stupid decisions, to go to scary places and end up in strained relationships. My recipe for messiness includes selfishness, pride, insecurity and obviously – perfectionism.
Travelling to Africa and meeting women who struggled with problems so different from my own in North America and yet finding our hearts were so much the same changed the game for me.
I am moving from the path of let-me-just get-this-all-perfect-in-here-and-then-I-can-put-myself-out-there to the path of a-burden-shared-is-more-easily-carried. I no longer want to strive for perfection but instead want to strive to form relationships and community where we can walk side-by-side, stumbling forward all the while knowing we will never, ever get where we are going and therefore can take our time, listen to each other stories and appreciate the views along the way.
I still feel this quote every single day:
“The line between good and evil does not lie between ‘us’ and ‘them,’ between the West and the rest, between Left and Right, between rich and poor. That fateful line runs down the middle of each of us, every human society, every individual. ”
~N. T. Wright, from Surprised by Scripture
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